Well, i realized that i dont talk much about what im feeling. so yah, ima start using this again lol. well, it has been a decent past 2 months. evrything is falling into place, i guess. well i like my life atm, there well go with that. but, its christmas today. its been really nice. it actually feels like a family when we all sit around the tree and open the presents and stuff. i got this new laptop, which is AMAZING! thats what im typing on right now. xP coolness. lol. well, relationship wise im still single. it never happened with taylor but ive been talking to dallas. idk, i get so confused. he realizes that he chooses girls who dont care, but the one who does he never goes for. and like, he flirts and stuff, but he never does anything. if you like me dallas, make a move. dont just lead me on. its not fair to me :/ but dont worry, i care about you and always will :). well, i found out austin liked me. i kinda panicked if you know what i mean. its just, hes a good friend and i never wanna lose him, but only as a friend. nothing more. thats it. so i told him i was gonna hook up with dallas. it worked. but then i knew emily liked him. so i hooked em up. this is nothing personal against austin, but the second i said emily liked him, he was like oh i liked her the whole time. idk i guess that was just kinda low, showing how little of me he thought. i dont like him or anything so dont get me wrong, but it kinda hurt. like, i see all these people go in and out of relationships like nothing. but the one prson who wants one and wants to care about someone and be loved, i cant have that. but w.e. id rather w8 for the right person instead of a shitty relationship. my grades slipped there for a moment. idk i just didnt feel like trying. i kinda wanna switch schools to nphs, but i dont think thatll ever happen. i brought it up to my mom but basically what she told me is im throwing my life away by even thinking about it. so out the window that goes lol. sergio and amanda have been dating and all sorts of shit has been happening because of it. not saying its their fault, i think theyre happy and thats all that matters, but this and that and w.e. i just hope everybody figures things out because i hate seeing everyone sad. ive been getting really close to nicole l8ly. its nice. we lost our friendship there for a lil but were best friends now. and thats the way i like it. weve been best friends since kindergarten, and i do have to admit what happened between us was kinda my fault. :/ but its all good now ^_^ she lives close to me too so we get to hang a lot. well, ill keep posting. this computer has a program where i can just click, type and post. i dont even have to log on to blogger, which is sweet. so my diary is back on! well blog, w.e you wanna call the damn thing lol xP. peace out.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
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ahhh i tried calling you at least 7 times yesterday, and left 3 messages but i dont think you were awake. =[ me and ashlynn ran down to your house and everything. but you just didnt pick up. and then later we went to the mall and i tried to call you and see if you wanted to come but you didnt pick up!! lol. so that means that we need to hang out sometime soon, maybe while im at my grandmas house again or maybe you can ride down here some tme. ill call yo later!! =D ♥♥♥
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