Fucking Backstabbing....

Ok, well, apparently dallas hasnt been talking to me. at all. he said all those sweet and lovely things and then he completely just dropped me. i couldnt believe it. tell a girl you want to be her first kiss and date and that ull change just for her and then drop her? what a dick. but then, a week and a half l8r, no text, no call, nothing. so i text him the other night and say so are you gonna say hi to me at all or just keep ignoring me? so he called. and the only reason he called is cause i sent that text. but he wasnt even paying attention to me. he was texting his friend and all this shit. so im just like ugh. but w8, it gets better. and then so, the next morning i was all upset cause im like well apparently hes over me after everything he made me believe. so i was texting ashlynn about it and shes like, "yah  hes been talking to a LOT lately" as in she was saying he was flirting or something. and im like oh, way to go. that sure makes me feel SO much better -.- and i was texting nicole and shes like yah this morning he said it wouldnt work cause he wouldnt see you and u guys r too much of friends. and im like, "ok isnt this something you think about fucking BEFORE you tell the girl you wanna date her and lead her on like there's no damn tomorrow!!!!!" but it get even better! then i hear nicole skipped class with him. and then she was hanging with him after school!!!! i mean, i know hes gonna have friends, but come on. my BEST friend, thats just being a bitch. all i hear is oh hey i was with dallas after he completely just broke my heart. and shes only been hanging with  him ever since this happened, which i think is completely ironic. its like, i know that i wasnt even dating him. but it hurts so fucking much! because all i want is for someone to care about me. thats all i want. and i thought he cared. i truly did. he was saying things that people would say if theyve been dating for years. but no.. he was just having fun cause he though it would never work. FUCKING BASTARD!!! i feel like ive been kicked in the stomach, chewed up and spit back out. i just, i feel so used. and to top that off betrayed because nicole is doing this. its just, not saying she cant be friends with him, its not like hes my property or anything. but the fact that he did this to ME, her best friend, but shes gonna hang with him like oh hey. i dont care u completely used my best friend noooooo. OH! btw, she fucking defended him!!! im sitting here crying my eyes out about what he did and shes all, "well i know ur hurt but he didnt mean to..." btw if he didnt want to hurt me THEN FUCKING DONT LEAD ME ON IF YOU NEVER WANTED ANYTHNG "... he does like you he just knows he wont be able to see you". oh ok nicole, well let me think about this. i dont see him for 2 months, HES the one who called me, gets these emotions for me even though he hasnt seen me for 2 MONTHS, leads me on and doesnt realize he wont see me. not only that but he never even fucking tried to see me!  i just, i feel so betrayed and backstabbed and hurt. i wanna cry all the time. i feel like i cant trust anyone. well obviously i can trust some people but u know? i can deal with what dallas, i know im hurting because of it and hes a fucking bastard for what he did, but nicole? not my best friend. im not saying she means to hurt me, but she should realize she is. i just, i dont know what to do. i dont know why this happened. i was SO happy about dallas and then apparently hes just all "oh i didnt mean it i know it wont work so im just gonna completely act like u dont exist" i mean if he came to me and told me how he feels i would understand, but no he ditches me and makes me think like I did something wrong. and not only that, but if he knew it wouldnt work, well idk, DONT LEAD ME ON AND MAKE ME THINK UR GONNA TRY TO MAKE IT WORK! cause fyi bitch, it makes it hurt all the more.